depressed in Coping with Loss Forum

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princess8120

depressed

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04/30/2004 7:54 AM

Forever in our hearts

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on wednesday i had my 2nd prenatal visit which he was supposed to hear the heartbeat. he looked for it for quite a while and couldn't find it so he did an ultrasound. the baby wasn't moving and had no heartbeat. my baby stopped growing at 7 weeks and 5 days. this is so sad. im so depressed. i cant help but think its my fault even though i tried to do everything i was suppose to. i remember that at 7 weeks and 6 days i had awful cramping but it felt like my stomach and it made me have diarhea so i just thought my stomach was upset. i guess maybe it was the baby leaving...but i never had any bleeding and the only cramping was that day. i wish i would have had some kind of single before that way i woulndt of been in complete shock. yesterday i had a D&C. they took my baby from me. this has just been an awful week and will continue to be awful for quite a while. i take everything to heart and i dont if i can feel the same again. when i got home from the d&c i about fainted..i guess b/c of all the drugs they gave me. well i guess im going to go cry some more...

Krystle & Clay
Married 10/15/02

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Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 8:07 AM

oh i am so sorry that u lost ur baby.my heart is breaking for u.

:hugs

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princess8120

Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 8:16 AM

Forever in our hearts

thank you for your kind words

Krystle & Clay
Married 10/15/02

Missed M/C~ baby stopped growing @ 7 weeks 5 days weeks, found out when i was 10 weeks 3 days on 4/28/04, had D&C 4/29/04

A million times we'll miss you,
a million times we'll cry.If loving could have saved you,you never would have died.

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Thisonetyme

Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 8:17 AM

Krystle,

I'm so sorry for your loss :hugs

. Missed miscarriages are very difficult. Everyone here in pregnancy loss is so great and they help so much!! Its great having a group of caring ladies who have been there themselves and know exactly what we are going through.

Whenever you need to vent we are here! :hugs

Tammy 27
DH 27
DS 6
1st MC @ 7 weeks 4/7/03
2nd MC(missed),D&C @ 11 weeks 3/31/04

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sunworld

Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 9:18 AM

Harley & Luka's Mummy

Find me @ cs.yuku.com!

Krystle,

I responded to your other thread, but I also wanted to say that I do not honestly know how I would have coped after my m/c, without this board and the wonderful ladies on it. Everything will feel pretty numb now, but I just wanted you to know that I am here if you need a shoulder to cry on. :hugs

Tracy & Henrik
m/c 1st Sept 2003 @ 8 weeks

My Chart

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denise622

Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 10:15 AM

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Krystle,

I am so very sorry for your loss :hugs

TTC #1 since June 2002

denisen622@hotmail.com

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Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 11:14 AM

Krystal,
I am sorry to hear about your loss.. If I am not mistaken you were on the November Board? I was there too and lost my baby at the same exact time you did 7w 5-6 days... I know exactly how you feel.. When I found out I couldn't speak... I just could only shake my head at the doctors answers because I couldn't handle the news. I too didn't have a heartbeat and have had d&c's in the past.. you walk out feeling empty and lost. Hold on and hold tight to your DH.. He is greiving also... Your hormones are going to be so wacky and cause you such hi's and lows that you will feel like your going crazy.. one advise is to cry all you want.. get it out and don't hold it in... there is therapy in crying for a woman. Be good to yourself and cut yourself some slack... you didn't do anything wrong... if there was anything you could have done to save your baby you would have done it in a minute.. so you didn't do anything wrong. I have been taking a tylanol once a day and that is helping me with my daily headaches and calming my nerves a little... it has helped me to go on so to speak.. I wish I could hug you....
if you want to email me off line. feel free dtate@houstonharvestgifts.com
I lost the same point in my pregnancy and I am walking with you...
Denise

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Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 12:36 PM

I am so sorry that you are going through this.
I will be praying for you and your family!

:heart1

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beth7919

Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 1:07 PM

Drew's Mommy!

Find me @ cs.yuku.com!

i am sorry! i do know how you feel..i too had an ultrasound..and the baby didn't grow..we had a d&c the next morning..that was so much harder then a natural m/c...

i too had the stomach cramp/pain the night before my ultrasound..this happened for my second and third m/c..very strange..and since it happened once before to me...i knew what it meant this time around...i am not sure what it is..

i am sorry..please trust me..the days will get easier for you.. :hugs

Beth (25)
Chris (27)
married 9-4-03
m/c 8-22-03 #1
m/c 10-3-03 #2
m/c 3-25-04 (d&c) #3
(baby girl-chromosome disorder)

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KimD76

Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 8:28 PM

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I am so sorry Krystle. This has happened to me twice. Both times we lost the h/b and I had to have D&C's. If you have any questions or concerns please feel free to ask them. We are all here for you. I know you are tired of hearing it, but time will heal the pain, I promise. :hugs

P.S..I read once that you are from the Mississippi Gulf Coast...if I remember right. I am too! Cool huh?

TTC #1 since 2001

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princess8120

Re: depressed

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04/30/2004 10:47 PM

Forever in our hearts

thanks you all i hope everything gets better eventually but its going to be slow for me. i always take things so hard and blame myself. i'll try to be good though, sometimes.

Kim~ hey sorry hun i'm from kentucky and born in texas. your not too awfully far away though.

Krystle & Clay
Married 10/15/02

Missed M/C~ baby stopped growing @ 7 wks 5 days, found out when i was 10 wks 3 days on 4/28/04, had D&C 4/29/04

A million times we'll miss you,a million times we'll cry.If loving could have saved you,you never would have died.

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KimD76

Re: depressed

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05/01/2004 7:59 AM

Oh okay...I remember the person had princess in her name and I thought it was you. We are still pretty close though!

TTC #1 since 2001

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AmyLourene

so sorry

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05/01/2004 12:23 PM

Krystle-

for your loss. I had a missed abortion also. It is awful when they sit there looking, and looking for a heartbeat, and it just isn't there. I spent quite a few nights crying myself to sleep. It is hard to accept that you did nothing wrong, and there is nothing you could have done differently to change what happened. I still have those thoughts occasionally. I hope that you recover quickly from you D&C, and that you are back to ttc in no time. Stay positive...it will happen.

Amy

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lil squirt

Re: depressed

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05/01/2004 3:49 PM

Joshua & Michael's Mommy

I am so sorry.
I also had the same thing. My baby died at 9 weeks and we didn't know until my u/s at 13 weeks. Then I had to wait a week knowing that my baby was dead inside me.

I also went through what I may have done.
I put the crib up at 8w 6d.
I kick myself because I wonder if I jinxed myself.
I also had no signs. not even cramping.

It left an empty place in my heart. But I made a little memorial in the baby's room.

You have to understand that you did NOTHING wrong. Early m/c's are usually due to a genetic missing.

Hold your DH tight and come talk to us anytime you want to. I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts.

:hugs

Missed M/C Oct. 17
D&C Oct. 23, 2003

M/C February 2004

Shnetter@aol.com

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princess8120

Re: depressed

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05/01/2004 4:52 PM

Forever in our hearts

i will try to think positive but its just so hard. im going to be worried out of my mind if i get pregnant again. i already thought every little thing meant something. for now i will try not to be so depressed but i cant guarantee anything. i talk to my baby in heaven sometimes..tell him how i feel and how i miss him.

Krystle & Clay
Married 10/15/02

Missed M/C~ baby stopped growing @ 7 wks 5 days, found out when i was 10 wks 3 days on 4/28/04, had D&C 4/29/04

A million times we'll miss you,a million times we'll cry.If loving could have saved you,you never would have died.

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lil squirt

Re: depressed

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05/01/2004 6:23 PM

Joshua & Michael's Mommy

You know what made me feel better??
Knowing that my baby is with me Grandfather. He passed when I was only 5. But I sure remember him. And hear stories about him all the time.

I told myself that grandpa has been up there for so long he wanted company. And because I was so special to him, he chose our baby to be with him.

Makes me cry with happiness to know that our Angel is with such a great man.

Missed M/C Oct. 17
D&C Oct. 23, 2003

M/C February 2004

Shnetter@aol.com

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princess8120

Re: depressed

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05/01/2004 7:00 PM

Forever in our hearts

thats sweet annette. i try to think that my baby is in a better place where he cant be harmed.

Krystle & Clay
Married 10/15/02

Missed M/C~ baby stopped growing @ 7 wks 5 days, found out when i was 10 wks 3 days on 4/28/04, had D&C 4/29/04

A million times we'll miss you,a million times we'll cry.If loving could have saved you,you never would have died.